I recently had the plug pulled on a recording project that I was gearing up for. That's right, another album was in the works! But alas, it'll have to wait. I knew something was off, that my energy wasn't aligned, but I kept moving forward until it was officially shelved. After all, quitting isn't fashionable and creating is always hard work.
Twenty-four hours after the phone call that effectively cancelled the endeavor, I was sitting in front of a blank word document, staring at the words "Chapter 1".
Yes! My next novel is now in progress:) I have a TON of work ahead of me, years maybe, and it's not unlike the amount of work required to bring a recording project to fruition. However, I was bristling with excitement to get started on the novel, which was nearly the exact opposite of how I felt about the album.
Below are some lessons I learned upon reflection:
1) I must be honest with myself about my energy around the work required. Yes there are aspects that are tedious and mundane and costly and really not fun. But I know what it's like to have a positive energy around doing those things, or to feel like they are sucking my life source.
2) Once again, messaging matters. When I look back at the months surrounding the lead up to the recording process, I was crystal clear to the universe that I was NOT at all clear that I wanted to do this:) And hence it has stalled.
3) Ryan Holiday, author of titles such as Stillness is the Key, Ego is the Enemy, and The Obstacle is the Way (which I'm currently reading and enjoying), shared this perspective on deciding whether or not quitting is the right choice: sometimes the hardest option is the right way. Of course there will never be a cut and dry template for such decisions, but I found this interesting. When I think back to the album, choosing to quit was impossible for me, and yet I knew I didn't truly want to proceed. It was easier for me to just forge ahead and accept that all the resistance I was experiencing was only part of the creative process (we call birthing labor, after all). Going forward, I'll be more inclined to do some soul searching around which path requires more courage.